Title: Offbeat
Series: The Offbeat Series #1
Author: S. Moose
Genre: New Adult/Coming of Age
Release Date: October 5, 2015
Synopsis
People think you can only love one person. That’s not true. There are two types of love; the forever kind and the always kind.
Forever love means you can’t live without that person. When you close your eyes the image you see is the two of you holding hands, sitting on the porch, and watching your grandchildren playing in the yard. You look over, smile, and whisper “we’ve lived a good life.”
Always love means you keep that person in your heart. They’ve done something for you to make you realize who you are. This person means so much to you and lives in your heart.
One night of truth.
One night of passion.
But all of that was taken in one night and I’m left alone.
I’m fighting to breathe and holding onto the tiniest shred of hope I have. It’s a losing battle and I’m not sure how much more I can take. Every day is a struggle. That night still haunts me and I see his face. It’s been two years and slowly I’m piecing my life back together.
Until one secret throws my life offbeat again.
I'm Bayleigh Murphy, and this is my story, my journey of forever and always.
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Dear Tyler,
People say you fall in love only once, and when you find that love you have to hold on tight and never let go. They say when you look into the eyes of love your heart beats wild and free; nothing else matters. The air around you becomes too thick and unless you're holding on to love’s hand, you'll suffocate. That love is the most important thing, and your reason to wake up with a smile on your face.
When we first met, I didn't think it was possible to fall in love. You were this little boy with bright blue eyes and brown hair. I went to my mom and told her I found Prince Charming. For seven years you stayed by my side and were my best friend. On my 12th birthday, you asked me to be your girlfriend and that was the best gift ever. You've been my light, my reason, for as long as I can remember. Sometimes I wonder what life will be like without you and I can't imagine it. We’ve been through so much together and have stood by each other's side. I never needed to date other guys and you never doubted your love for me.
The thing is… Sometimes love isn’t enough; the most powerful feeling in the world, the one feeling people want to experience, just can't fix everything.
That’s the problem when bad things happen to good people.
I don’t even know where to start. I could go on and on about how much I love you and how much you mean to me. I can tell you that you’re my world and the very reason I can breathe. You’ve fixed my heart so many times, but this time you can’t.
I have to let you go. I’m so sorry. I don’t know how else to tell you this, because I know if I look into your blue eyes I’ll take back everything. I know you think I’m selfish, but I’m doing this for you. You deserve the world. You deserve someone who isn’t broken. I’m giving you the chance to live again without worrying about me. I won’t ask you to wait for me and I won’t promise you I’ll get better, because I don’t know when or if I will. I know that if I make that promise you’ll stop living your life and wait around for me. I can’t allow that to happen.
The problem with making promises is that there’s no guarantee they can be kept. Promises set up expectations, and expectations leads to disappointment and resentment. That’s why I have to do this, so you don’t miss out on your life.
Please find someone who’ll bring the light back into your eyes...for me. She’s going to be the luckiest girl, because you’re an amazing guy. The past seventeen years have been magical and I’ll never let go of everything we’ve experienced together.
Please don’t hate me. I beg this of you. I want you in my life. You’re my best friend and that’s something I can’t let go of. My love for you will remain and maybe one day, if I get better, we can find our way again. Until then I need you to move on and be happy; the way you’re supposed to live. I need you to understand my reasoning for this letter, and when you’re ready to talk to me, I’ll be here.
There will never be a day that I don’t think about you. I love you so much, Tyler Scott. You’ll continue to be the reason my heart beats, forever.
Forever yours,
Bay
I hold the letter in my hands, reading the words through my blurry vision. The pain in my chest rips through and the madness in my head is spiraling out of control. My eyes search the letter. Maybe she wrote something to give me a clue that she just needs space and she doesn’t truly mean what she’s written. Girls are like that. They’ll say one thing and mean something totally different. Bayleigh is the queen of being secretive and tries hard to hide how she really feels from me. The only time I can get her to open up is when we’re face to face. Throughout the years I’ve studied her. I know her inside and out. I think I know her more than she knows herself. That’s why I know this letter isn’t what she feels. It’s a fucking copout.
At first I don’t panic. I read the letter again and try to picture her playing a joke or doing something funny. A smile is on my face when I call the front desk, asking if there are any other letters or packages for me. They confirm this is it and ask if I need anything else. I hang up the phone and open the door, looking both ways down the hall, wondering if she’s going to jump out and say gotcha.
Again, nothing.
Closing the door, I sit back down and read the letter again. This time I believe that it’s real. I know nothing will change. Words don’t magically appear. In my head I know that, but I can’t admit it.
Did I do something wrong?
Did she find someone new?
Why is she doing this?
My world falls apart and I can’t sort out the feelings and raging emotions. I grit my teeth and nearly rip the letter apart. Setting it down on the table, I pace the hotel room, fuming with insane anger. My breathing is erratic and I can’t talk.
I imagine her writing the letter and the look of relief on her face. She wants this. She wants to leave me, and thinks I’ll let her and seventeen years go without a fight. Love is a powerful emotion. Our love is powerful, and we’ve been through too much to let it go.
“Ahh,” I scream. Lashing out I take my anger out on the couch and table, flipping them over. Glass smashes on the carpet and tears roll down my cheeks.
Turning, I see the letter again and pick it up. She wrote a fucking letter to break up with me. Stomping into the bedroom, I throw the pillows off the bed, ripping the comforter and sheets.
Red. All I see is red.
Consumed with anger, I stand in the room looking at the destruction caused by my rage. Sliding down the wall, I fall to the floor and try to calm down. Only there’s nothing calming me down. My heart is breaking. I’ve lost everything; my world, my heart and my soul.
Taking my cell phone out of my pocket, I call her. The call goes straight to voicemail.
Hi, you’ve reached…
I hang up and keep calling. After the eighth time, I decide to give her my own letter.
“I’m never letting you go. I’m the guy for you, Bayleigh Murphy, and that’ll never change. I will see you again.”
Title: Offbeat
Author: S. Moose
Release Date: October 5, 2015
Genre: New Adult, Contemporary Romance, Coming of Age
Series or Standalone: Series (Offbeat Series #1)
Rating: ★★★ 1/2 Stars (Rounded to 4)
Reviewer: Melyssa
I’m always on the lookout for new
authors. Not so much “new” but ones that for me, I haven’t experienced before.
I’m always looking to fall in love with a new book boyfriend (one I might not
normally meet because there are literally a lot of authors still out there I’ve
never had the pleasure of reading), a new heroine that just steals my heart and
makes me love her, and even a new author to stalk.
S. Moose is one of those authors. Before being given an ARC of this story, I had never experienced her writing before. I was unfamiliar with her writing style, her previous characters or quite frankly, anything about her.
Offbeat was an interesting book for me for a few reasons.
One, it contains a love triangle. Now, normally in romance, you don’t wanna read about two guys (or girls) fighting over a girl (or guy). You want it to be one on one and that’s it. For me, I like walking on the wild side. I did it in my first series when I wrote it and I’m doing it here in reading a book that is based around that very thing.
It is indeed based heavily in a love triangle. More specifically a girl and two brothers (which I didn’t realize at first!), but that’s not all it is.
It’s a story of healing. Of doing what you think is the right thing for someone in the last moments of their life (even if it might match up with what others want or what you even want for yourself overall). It’s a story of heartbreak, love, and ultimately, even in your darkest moments, living life to the fullest.
Bayleigh, Tyler and Ryan gave me all of those things and more.
What Bayleigh went through before the novel begins (and what you are shown instances of throughout) is extremely difficult and having lived through something similar, I felt a kindship with her. It’s not easy moving on when your life has been touched by something as horrific and dark as that, but it’s even worse when it touches the people in your life that you love.
When you feel like the best thing for everyone involved, because of how changed you are, is to walk away.
Which brings us to Tyler.
Bayleigh and Tyler have always been meant to be. It’s something mentioned and shown in the book quite a bit and with the way the author portrayed it, it’s a given. I never once doubted that, not even with her best friend (and Tyler’s brother) Ryan came back into the picture.
I have to say for a good portion of this book, with everything that was shown, I was definitely team Tyler here. I don’t think I’ve ever come across a sweeter guy than the one that was shown to me here. He made some missteps though and unfortunately, with where they were placed within the story and how I had come to feel about Ryan and ultimately what Bayleigh was sacrificing to do for him (Ryan), by the time I turned the last page, it was like all of that goodness that I enjoyed about him went right out the window.
Of all the people that I expected to do what he did, it wasn’t him. I still have his words to her, those forever ones that he held onto for so long, in my head and I hate it because I guess, I expected better of him. I needed him to hold onto that. Let other people screw with her, hurt her and maybe even break her, but not him.
This book nailed me emotionally in a couple of spots too. From Bayleigh in the beginning (and for a while throughout) to Ryan and what he finally lets everyone know something about him later in the story, it hit me right in the feels. Maybe because they are things close to my own heart, situations I have faced or am facing now, but whatever the reason, it resonated. Bonded me even more to those two.
So if I felt things with this book and I connected with at least two of the characters, why wasn’t this a five star read for me?
The love angle. Mainly how quickly it appears with Ryan and Bayleigh. How it went from him being her best friend to her suddenly wanting him. Yet still trying to see Tyler as her happily ever after. It just didn’t fit. Her doing what she does near the end for Ryan, I felt that. Her decision, though unpopular, made sense to me. The events that took place before it though, fell short for me. I couldn’t grip onto her and Ryan as much as I wanted to in terms of romantic involvement.
Also the end. I realize this is a series (I realize it now anyway), but I guess I just wasn’t expecting it all to come to a head that quickly near the end the way it did. I felt kind of ripped off. Not because I didn’t get a HEA. I can handle that aspect, especially in series’ fiction, but within just a few page jumps (and after they’d all just gone through something brutalizing in its own right), it all gets dropped and then….the end. It threw me off.
While there were aspects of this book that didn’t work for me, there was quite a bit that still did, so I urge everyone to give it a try (unless it’s got things in it where you know it’s not your thing.). You may find that my opinion and yours don’t match and really that’s what reading is all about. This one just fell a little shorter of the mark than I was expecting, but still a strong book in its own right.
My thanks to the author and all others involved in letting me read this before release. I appreciate the chance and the feels that I did experience from it.
S. Moose is one of those authors. Before being given an ARC of this story, I had never experienced her writing before. I was unfamiliar with her writing style, her previous characters or quite frankly, anything about her.
Offbeat was an interesting book for me for a few reasons.
One, it contains a love triangle. Now, normally in romance, you don’t wanna read about two guys (or girls) fighting over a girl (or guy). You want it to be one on one and that’s it. For me, I like walking on the wild side. I did it in my first series when I wrote it and I’m doing it here in reading a book that is based around that very thing.
It is indeed based heavily in a love triangle. More specifically a girl and two brothers (which I didn’t realize at first!), but that’s not all it is.
It’s a story of healing. Of doing what you think is the right thing for someone in the last moments of their life (even if it might match up with what others want or what you even want for yourself overall). It’s a story of heartbreak, love, and ultimately, even in your darkest moments, living life to the fullest.
Bayleigh, Tyler and Ryan gave me all of those things and more.
What Bayleigh went through before the novel begins (and what you are shown instances of throughout) is extremely difficult and having lived through something similar, I felt a kindship with her. It’s not easy moving on when your life has been touched by something as horrific and dark as that, but it’s even worse when it touches the people in your life that you love.
When you feel like the best thing for everyone involved, because of how changed you are, is to walk away.
Which brings us to Tyler.
Bayleigh and Tyler have always been meant to be. It’s something mentioned and shown in the book quite a bit and with the way the author portrayed it, it’s a given. I never once doubted that, not even with her best friend (and Tyler’s brother) Ryan came back into the picture.
I have to say for a good portion of this book, with everything that was shown, I was definitely team Tyler here. I don’t think I’ve ever come across a sweeter guy than the one that was shown to me here. He made some missteps though and unfortunately, with where they were placed within the story and how I had come to feel about Ryan and ultimately what Bayleigh was sacrificing to do for him (Ryan), by the time I turned the last page, it was like all of that goodness that I enjoyed about him went right out the window.
Of all the people that I expected to do what he did, it wasn’t him. I still have his words to her, those forever ones that he held onto for so long, in my head and I hate it because I guess, I expected better of him. I needed him to hold onto that. Let other people screw with her, hurt her and maybe even break her, but not him.
This book nailed me emotionally in a couple of spots too. From Bayleigh in the beginning (and for a while throughout) to Ryan and what he finally lets everyone know something about him later in the story, it hit me right in the feels. Maybe because they are things close to my own heart, situations I have faced or am facing now, but whatever the reason, it resonated. Bonded me even more to those two.
So if I felt things with this book and I connected with at least two of the characters, why wasn’t this a five star read for me?
The love angle. Mainly how quickly it appears with Ryan and Bayleigh. How it went from him being her best friend to her suddenly wanting him. Yet still trying to see Tyler as her happily ever after. It just didn’t fit. Her doing what she does near the end for Ryan, I felt that. Her decision, though unpopular, made sense to me. The events that took place before it though, fell short for me. I couldn’t grip onto her and Ryan as much as I wanted to in terms of romantic involvement.
Also the end. I realize this is a series (I realize it now anyway), but I guess I just wasn’t expecting it all to come to a head that quickly near the end the way it did. I felt kind of ripped off. Not because I didn’t get a HEA. I can handle that aspect, especially in series’ fiction, but within just a few page jumps (and after they’d all just gone through something brutalizing in its own right), it all gets dropped and then….the end. It threw me off.
While there were aspects of this book that didn’t work for me, there was quite a bit that still did, so I urge everyone to give it a try (unless it’s got things in it where you know it’s not your thing.). You may find that my opinion and yours don’t match and really that’s what reading is all about. This one just fell a little shorter of the mark than I was expecting, but still a strong book in its own right.
My thanks to the author and all others involved in letting me read this before release. I appreciate the chance and the feels that I did experience from it.
Author Bio
S.Moose is a New York Times and USA Today Bestselling author, living in Webster, NY with her family, friends, and shorkie, Charlie.
A 2011 St. John Fisher graduate, S.Moose loves to read and write. She enjoys getting lost in the fictional world and creating a place where readers can fall in love and swoon over the cute boys she brings to life. When she isn't in her room in front of her computer or a book, she is with her family and friends being silly and enjoying life. She's romantic at heart and loves anything with a happily ever after.
S.Moose loves connecting with her readers! Be sure to visit her at:
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